by Lexi Inks
Unless you’re totally off-the-grid (in which case, how??), you’ve likely seen or heard about a few TikTok videos posted by Chappell Roan earlier this month. In the first video, posted on August 19, Roan began to address the behavior some of her fans have been engaging in since her massive, rapid rise to superstardom over the past few months. She draws a comparison between the ways most folks would respond to meeting a random stranger — they wouldn’t stalk her family, expect a hug from her, or dissect her personality online. “I’m a random b*tch. You’re a random b*tch. Just think about that for a second, OK?” the singer says to the camera.
In the following video Roan posted, she clarified her earlier statements by saying, “It’s weird how people think you know a person just because you see them online or you listen to the art they make. That’s f*cking weird!” I personally stand ten-toes-down behind her on this take. At the end of the day, even celebrities like Roan are still human beings, and it’s very rare that a human being would want people who were obsessed with them invading their personal space without consent while they were trying to walk to the local coffee shop or regularly stalking their family and friends. The assumptions many people make about their favorite celebrities are often a sinister symptom of the rise in parasocial relationships.
Still, as many of us have come to expect with famous women, some folks online took this as a chance to poke fun at or even discredit Roan altogether.
Have other celebrities gained a reputation as friendly and welcoming to their fans? Sure. Do some of them seem to enjoy stopping for photos, autographs, or hugs with the people who appreciate their art? Yes. But, does every famous person owe their time or physical affection or even their attention to fans — just because those fans stream their music or attend their performances? Absolutely f*cking not.
Roan has every right to assert her boundaries and share the ways that her “superfans” are impacting her day-to-day life. It’s one thing to vehemently support an artist you love and show them your appreciation in a respectful, non-invasive way. It’s another entirely to feel a sense of entitlement to having that adoring energy reciprocated by a person who is, essentially, still a stranger to you. Just like the saying goes with normal women, women celebrities also don’t owe you sh*t.
Plenty of people have echoed the sentiment that Chappell Roan isn’t “cut out” for fame if she doesn’t want the feverous attention or constant stalking, obsessing, and overanalyzing some fans continue to perpetuate on and offline. After all, it comes with the gig, right? Wrong. That was exactly her point in posting those TikTok videos. Just because psychotic fan behavior has been accepted as par for the course for decades doesn’t mean it should continue to be.
Eventually, the culture around celebrity, fandom, and parasocial relationships needs to change. Everyone needs to recognize that these famous people are still just that: people. Although their lives are undoubtedly made easier and more enjoyable in many ways (i.e. money, respect, power), there are other activities and lifestyle choices they can no longer engage in comfortably or privately once they are thrust into the public eye.
Although she actually started planting the seeds of her career over 10 years ago, Roan’s success in music didn’t truly start to blossom until this past year. The summer of 2024, even, could be credited with her astronomical rise into the stratosphere of fame. Headlining massive festivals like Governor’s Ball and taking her tour for The Rise and Fall of a Midwest Princess international are exciting advancements in her success as an artist, but all of these new opportunities and responsibilities and a dramatic increase in public visibility can be — understandably — overwhelming and exhausting. The best thing we can all do as people who love Chappell Roan, her music, and what she offers to the world is to just let her live her damn life.
Oh, and please don’t call her Kayleigh.
